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HRC trans board member marries as sex opposite of post-op gender

Megan Stabler

Transgender Human Rights Campaign board member Meghan Stabler has married another woman in Texas by legally declaring her gender as male, a development that could be considered controversial (and perhaps hypocritical) because of Stabler’s national prominence, and because of her position at HRC as the only known trans person sitting on the board.

The lesbian couple could not legally marry in Texas as such. But by declaring male gender-identity, presumably by way of a birth certificate that reflected her gender at birth, their union is recognized by that largely far-right leaning state.

Individuals who have had sex changes are not recognized to be their gender orientation for purposes of marriage in Texas in accordance with court rulings in Littleton v. Prange and Araguz v. Delgado.

Officials at HRC were asked for comment on this development, but did not respond before this newsmagazine went to press.

Visit lgbtweekly.com for continuing coverage of this breaking story.

Short URL: http://lgbtweekly.com/?p=16022

Posted by on Oct 13, 2011. Filed under Around the Nation, Bottom Highlights. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0. You can leave a response or trackback to this entry

46 Comments for “HRC trans board member marries as sex opposite of post-op gender”

  1. As a post-op Trans woman, I’ve never been clear on my rights as far as marriage to a man in the State of Florida. As humiliating as it must be to claim to be born a male, I suppose you do what you have to do to work the system. Love wins out. I wonder about inheritance issues, child custody issues, social security benefits etc. Can those be denied considering she had SRS?

  2. Yes, in Texas only Gay and :Lesbian Trans people can marry, straights can’t.

    Meghan didn’t do this to prove a point: she did it because she’s in love with her partner.

    But it does show the essential idiocy of the Texas court rulings. That’s a bonus.

    • No, this was simply a silly stunt that harms transsexuals. It does nothing to advance anything other than the interests of the Religious Right who now have an example to show that transsexuals really are just mentally ill… No wonder the transponders are so delighted.

      • As a transman I agree with Meagan and her decision. I met my husband during early stages of T, two years later we married. I used my female birthcertificate from Montana and we married in Illinois. Our gay friends see him and I only as a gay couple. Full transition for us transmen is risky and costs more so I live my life as best we can externally male emotionally male and in a legal marriage. Screw the system.

  3. Ohio’s the same way, Zoe! I could be fully transitioned and my birth certificate will still always have an ‘M’ on it, meaning I can do *exactly* what Megan did.

    It’s also another nail in the coffin in the fight to shove DOMA in the burn barrel of history!

    It’s always amazed and puzzled me that Boies and Olson hadn’t also brought into evidence about intersex and transsexuals fail to fit into that quaint phrase the bigots spew: “one man, one woman”!

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    […] HRC Trans Board Member Marries as Sex Opposite of Post-Op Gender. Read more […]

  5. Glad that Megan was able to marry! May they have a long and loving marriage! Would Guess that a few small minded Texans are scurrying around like disturbed ants asking “HOW CAN THAT HAPPEN?”

  6. I find this story and its lack of consideration for the privacy of Meghan and Erin disturbing.

    Additionally, it was published without contacting either for the reasons behind chose their pathway to a legally recognized union. I can give you HRC’s position :

    HRC is committed to all persons enjoying the legal and matrimonial benefits which are afforded by the sanctioning of marriage, whether the couple be same sex or not. It is an ongoing goal of our organization and our supporters to insure these rights are not infringed upon or denied to anyone because of their sex, sexual orientation or gender identity. We will continue to fight until this goal is reached.

    Some transgender folk marry cisgender folk. Get over it

  7. Although she had to denigrate herself by claiming male status, I love the way she poked it in the eyez of texas!! They (texas) can’t continue to have it both ways — when will they realize denying marriage to two consenting adults is flat out discrimination!

  8. If I were in Meghan’s situation, I’d do the same thing! Work the system if that works for you… there is no hypocrisy, she has just made clear what jerks those Texas judges are as well as those who appoint them!

    What would be interesting is how their marriage would be treated if they moved to another state … perhaps NJ where same sex marriages are treated as civil unions and changes of birth certificates are accepted.

  9. By doing this, issues of “love” aside, Megan has exercised trans privilege over every gay and lesbian couple in Texas. There should be a price for doing so such as only recognition of Megan’s gender as male by everyone…..no more female pronouns or claims of womanhood when you have legally declared yourself male.

    Either you are a woman post operatively or you are not, Megan legal took “not”.

  10. Horrible. Just horrible. The damage from this act will reverberate for a long, long time.

    Sara …

  11. […] …except when I’m a MAN.   […]

  12. Megan is exactly what the Tee-Gees want her to be, Megan marginalizes us those of us born with a legitimate birth condition.

    There is no more blatant exercise of Male Privilege than doing what this “person” did.

    I don’t even know why I am using female pronouns.

  13. Hurt and saddened

    “controversial (and perhaps hypocritical)”

    It is neither.

    Assuming that he (I’m using his declared gender) was put on the board by HRC because he tows the HRC line, this is nothing more than yet another attack on transsexuals by Joe and Co.. Crossdressers they can handle. Transsexuals on the other hand must be eradicated.

    HRC no longer has a transsexual on their board. By definition & diagnosis criteria, Mr. Stabler is not a transsexual. By self proclamation, Mr. Stabler is a crossdresser. He identifies as male but likes to appear as a woman, sometimes.

    To anyone outside of the GLB(t) umbrella, this stunt clearly proves that gender identity is a choice, a lifestyle that can change at will. Want to feel girly? Dress up, take hormones and have surgery claiming to be a “woman inside”. Want better Federal benefits? Claim that you are actually still a man.

    The Focus on the Family crowd will have a field day with this and the rest of us transsexuals will have to live with the harm done to us by this unnecessary action for a long time to come. The fact that it came from a HRC insider should not surprise anyone. They’ve shown over and over that their only focus is gay marriage. Trans people and their need for basic equality (things like housing, employment &health care) only get in the way and need to be stomped down as irrelevant.

    Well done, Mr Solomon. Well done, Mr. Stabler.

    • I think they should have a field day with this along with everyone who casts a suspicious eye on the Tee-Gees.

      I don’t give a damned I have mine and my legal female sex.

      How this person could commit such a selfish self centered act baffles me.
      If I ever cross paths with this fool I will do the same thing I said I would to the other fool who carries a penis and has the intention of taking legal female status. I will call them a fraud to their face loud enough for everyone around t hear. I will out them for the fraud they are.

  14. Dana Lane Taylor

    Oh wow…what a sellout. 🙁

  15. Serious some of the replies amaze me. In Texas you cannot legally marry if you are same sex. With the Nikki A court case their court invalidated her marriage because she was born male and they considered her male at the time of marriage regardless of her post op status. So the only possble way she can marry in that state is to marry a female.

    Given the Texas ruling and the complaints here it would seem that we might as well say that Transsexuals do not qualify to be married. Are we really splitting hairs like this.

    I’m post op, I’m still married to my wife of 21 years. Should I have “dissolved” my marrieage to appease the people here as I was married as a male? c’mon people .. look past the BS, it’s about love not the system

  16. I wish them well.

    After all – who’s business is it what her gender is? It’s what it is. As Zoe said, she shows up the sheer stupidity of Texas’s homophobic laws and decisions.

    “Megan is exactly what the Tee-Gees want her to be”? What would the Tee-Esses want her to be? You should write to her and let her know what she needs to be.

    Oy vey. Some folk just need to look on the dark side of everything; if it’s a happy story, it’s a plot, a silly stunt; if it’s not that, then someone is complying with the wishes of a mysterious clan. My, oh my – you’d think those evil Tee-Gees were responsible for all the ill in the world!

    Why can’t it be: Ms Stabler used the law to her advantage? It’s not as if she was changing anything from an official Texas viewpoint. The law in Texas regards her as a man, anyway. So what if she used that to her advantage? Wish her and her spouse well and stop being miserable.

  17. Silly question: when is it anyone’s business why two people get married?

  18. It is inevitable that there is going to be a huge amount of backlash over this. I think it is important to remember that it is the injustice of Texas that is at the root cause of this case, and it should not be considered a failure on Megan’s part in any way.

    Shame on those of you who are thinking more about your political aspirations than the happiness and freedom of a woman to seek whatever comfort she can find under this repressive regime. I wonder how quick some of you were to criticize Nikki Araguz, as well?

    If you want to be angry at anyone, be angry at the government of the State of Texas, the real culprit. It is quite easy to sit back and say, “I would have done differently.” It is another thing entirely to be faced with the choice yourself. I will not judge Megan and her partner and find them wanting for loving each other. I, too, live in a state where marriage equality is unavailable, and I will be presently relocating to a state where not only is marriage equality unavailable, there are also no statewide anti-discrimination protections available.

    While I am currently single, should I find myself in a relationship where marriage is a conceivable outcome, I don’t know what I will do, and I will not know unless and until the situation presents itself. Many of you here may already know me as a very public and vocal advocate for the equal protection of the rights of trans people, and I say to you that self-care must come first in any healthy approach to activism.

    I recognize some of the names here, as well, and I will also say this: I personally will do everything I possibly can to ensure your attempts to divide the community of trans people, as well as the communities of lesbians and of women in general, against each other fail.

    May the day come soon when all of this will be moot, and may Megan and her partner enjoy a long, happy, and fulfilling life together!

    • No, I am angry at Mr. Stabler. If he wanted to get married, there are several states where he could have entered into a legal marriage without doing serious harm to transsexuals. But he chose to play the fool and engage in behavior first pushed by Phillip Frye in Houston. Old Phil, one of the nastier of the transsexual hating transgender extremists was the first push the idea of such a marriage. All it does is support those who will gleefully say, “See, I told you he was REALLY a man.”

  19. I think that this is a case of rubbing a poor court ruling in conservative faces of a backwards ass state. I was recently in Austin and had dinner with several of my sister’s lesbian friends. I told them that if gay marrage was not legalized in California by overturning proposition 8, I planned on marrying my girlfriend in Texas. They didn’t consider it offensive and all thought it was a wonderful idea. It is also a slap in the face of Texas on this issue. Thumbs up Meghan for finding a way to marry your love! To hell with those trannies or bible thumpers who disapprove!

    • Why is it a slap in the face of those in Texas. You do that and they will gladly acknowledge you as 100% male, and so will I. You are harming transsexuals and delighting the rednecks.

  20. Meghan has done what any responsible family person should do…. take care of their family and take advantage of all available protections.

    anything less would be , frankly, stupid and irresponsible.

    Does anyone not understand the concept of personal responsibility and real family values?

  21. So now we are giving the appearance that we can change our sex like we change our socks. This is absurd and very damaging to all of us TGs. We have enough to contend with and are at odds with more stereotypes than most. Our battle is uphill enough and then we have a person who is in a fairly prominent position and supposed to be advocating for us do something like this which only fuels the fire of those who think we are just crazy and have earned our spot in the DSM. When I transitioned to male its because I feel that I am a male and always have been. I would never go downtown to a bar and request to be let in for free on ladies night because I have ovaries. I am a man and transitioned to be one and as such live as one. This just really upsets me and I feel does us harm as a community as a whole.

    • No, it does nothing to TGs. It hurts transsexuals. This is a perfect example of why many, if not most, transsexuals want NO PART of “transgender.” This is a perfect example of someone acting like a fool, hurting people who just want to leave their past behind, and get on with their lives, and delighting in making a public spectacle.

  22. I would sure love to know from where the author sourced his information. Seems like the whole LGBT blogosphere has been set ablaze by this article, yet I’ve seen nothing from Ms Stabler or the HRC regarding her alleged marriage. She has posted nothing about it on her Facebook page, and in contrast, continues to post about other things as if nothing unusual has happened.

    I have searched online for some third party verification, and the only article I’ve found that didn’t use THIS article as its source was one written last June, regarding same sex marriage, that said Ms Stabler and her girlfriend planned to wed in October in New York.

    • Good question. However, neither Mr. Stabler, nor the HRC has denied the story. Given the amount of negative opinions that have resulted I would think they would do that if it were not true. It appears they are hoping it will simply go away.

  23. What bothers me the most about this is the lack of regard for the law.
    Change the law don’t break it. I know Martin Luther King Jr. wouldn’t approve of this. I see some tee-Gees quoting MLK where not around when he was living and they take his quotes out of context. That is just as bad as Christian fundamentalists who take Bible quotes out of context to drive their agenda.
    it makes me sick to my stomach those who misuse quotes from both the Bible and MLK are little more than common criminals.

  24. I considered at one time marrying my partner in Minnesota under the color of law while I still had an “M” on my driver’s license. I saw it as an act of protest against an unjust system: The only thing allowing my partner and me to marry when other lesbians could not was a single letter on a small plastic card.

    Would I then have been subject to deliberate misgendering, because I chose to make a sacrifice in the commission of an act of protest against injustice?

  25. Wrong? Aren’t we judgmental? How does that hurt transsexuals? You now sound like the right wing religionists who say same-sex marriage will hurt “traditional” marriage? Give me a break!

    This was no public spectacle, but obviously some one “needed” to report it and gain attention. If you want to shoot someone in this case … shoot the messenger who made a big deal about it, as the message was an honest one, and public documents of one’s private life are public.

    • “Babs
      October 19, 2011 – 1:42 pm

      Wrong? Aren’t we judgmental? How does that hurt transsexuals? You now sound like the right wing religionists who say same-sex marriage will hurt “traditional” marriage? Give me a break!”

      You are wrong Babs this delegitimatizes women who are born transsexual.

      “This was no public spectacle, but obviously some one “needed” to report it and gain attention. If you want to shoot someone in this case … shoot the messenger who made a big deal about it, as the message was an honest one, and public documents of one’s private life are public.”

      So you think fraud should be kept in the closet eh?

      Shooting the messenger is attractive but murder is a crime.
      Like fraudulently changing your birth certificate after having your balls chopped off this marriage is a fraud.

      The only people who change sex to fit the occasion are transvestites.

  26. I disagree with the following paragraph in this story

    “The lesbian couple could not legally marry in Texas as such. But by declaring male gender-identity, presumably by way of a birth certificate that reflected her gender at birth, their union is recognized by that largely far-right leaning state.”

    Ms Stabler never had to “declare male gender identity”. Texas does not consider one’s “gender identity” in determination of sex for the purpose of marriage. Texas chooses to use the birth sex, or sex assigned at birth for their declaration of sex, regardless of whether one has had their birth certificate amended or corrected.

    I have not been shown where on the application for marriage in Texas someone declares what gender identity they are. This is not semantics but is what is at the core of gender identity versus physical sex

  27. chris cook

    It’s fraud because the state of Texas gets to make all the rules.
    Do I have to draw a picture?

    You get the law changed, you don’t brake it.
    We are a country of laws not selfish children who just do what they want to with no regard for the law.

  28. How’s All That Banning Workin’ Fer Ya? | The Transadvocate

    […] routine whilst apparently angling for a job alongside Alyson Robinson (whose comments on the May-gun Stay-bluh marriage I must have missed) in the steppin’ fechit wing of the Rhode Island Avenue Cesspool: […]

  29. I’m really impressed with your writing skills and also with
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  30. Is there a supreme court case here???? LOL Go Megan..

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