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Gay white privilege and the hypocrisy of our community

Social Chaos: Scene Out

Jason Collins | PHOTO: ANA PINES

The Human Rights Campaign of San Diego and Equality Professionals Network previewed the 2015 Corporate Equality Index (CEI) Nov. 4. Jeff Krehely, vice president and chief foundation officer for the Human Rights Campaign was the special guest and provided the attendees with information on the HRC CEI and discussed the points system in which they rate businesses and some of the new criteria they’re including for their next report. For instance, any business that donates to an anti-LGBT organization will get points deducted. There are some corporations like Exxon that have gotten a negative score. Not only does Exxon fail to meet a single criterion in the equality survey, but they also had points deducted for engaging in activities that are detrimental to LGBT Equality.

Jason Collins, the first openly active professional basketball player with the NBA spoke about his experience in professional sports and his plans of empowering people to be their “true selves.” He talked about how his life has gotten considerably better since coming out on the cover of the May 2013 issue of Sports Illustrated. He spoke about the homophobic culture that is embedded in sports which makes it hard for men and women to come out. He acknowledged the women that have paved the way for other athletes by being their “true selves” despite greater risks to their careers.

After the end of the interview, he gave away a signed jersey to a lucky member of the audience. She answered the trivia question of who Collins was first traded to in 2001, which was the Houston Rockets. He stuck around for a bit and took photos with some of the attendees.

The event was hosted by Qualcomm Inc. and sponsored by Manpower and Mintz Levin. The presentation made us wonder how some of the businesses in Hillcrest would be rated in terms of race and gender diversity. If we hold businesses to standards of equality based on sexual orientation, why don’t we question businesses in Hillcrest that only employ males, and in most cases, white gay males? Why don’t we address discrimination and prejudice within the LGBTQ community? To read the Corporate Equality Index Report and which businesses rated well on corporate policies and practices pertinent to lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender employees, visit hrc.org

Halloween nightmare

Halloween was fun but we were bummed that we had no idea Nightmare on Normal St. occurred the weekend before. We must be really out of the loop lately or just getting older. We saw some posts from friends on social media who also had no clue it was happening but we imagine that it must’ve been fun to be able to party two weekends dressed in costumes in Hillcrest.

On Halloween night, we did go out with our friends. They love going to Pecs for its strong drinks and cheap prices. Although our friends love us and invite us out, some of the other fellas in the bar don’t see it that way. We barely go to Pecs and when we do, they treat us like we’re planning on taking over the bar.

We can assure you that none of our female friends are jealous of us going to Pecs. We go for our friends and we try not to go too often because, as we are often reminded, it’s a “man’s bar”.

When we do go for a birthday or an occasion like Halloween, we cross our fingers that no one is somehow “offended” that there are women in there. We keep to ourselves and stay for an hour or two and that’s that.

This Halloween evening, we not only heard offensive remarks about our gender but also race.

On this occasion, we were complimenting someone’s costume as we were coming in from the patio. The other two people that were talking to him said some racist and sexist remarks. He told us, “Don’t listen to those f*gs!” He somehow defended us but we took the statement with a grain of salt because as part of the LGBTQ community, we do find that word offensive.

We think that it’s unfortunate that we should feel uncomfortable and unwanted by a community that should embrace us as “family”. Boys, just because you don’t have to sleep with women, it doesn’t mean you should be jerks to us. To quote Tupac, “A woman brought you to this world. You have no right to disrespect one.”



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Posted by on Nov 20, 2014. Filed under Bottom Highlights, Scene Out. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0. You can leave a response or trackback to this entry

1 Comment for “Gay white privilege and the hypocrisy of our community”

  1. As unfortunate as this situation was for you two at a place I love to patronize (Pecs,) I feel it pertinent to point out that it does — frequently — come from the other side, as well. I can’t begin to express my disgust at the level of loathsome disdain the presence of men created at Gossip Grill one particular Saturday afternoon when the bar hosted the Flag Football post-game day drink-up. “Too much penis here, you fags have your own bars, get out, go somewhere else, no dick suckers allowed…” and far, far worse. I can honestly say that for as much as I hear lesbians complain that gay men are sexist, hateful assholes, I personally only EVER hear issues of lesbians not liking gay men, not wanting them around, purposely going out of their way to not be around them and acting vicious & hostile towards them. I wish we could get past this kind of petty BS, realize that we’re on the same team and, really, just fucking get along. #ILoveMyLesbians

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